Beautiful Things

It is rainy (yea!) and cold here in the Bay Area, so I had the chance to wear a beautiful scarf my mother-in-law knit and gave me for Valentine's. (I saw her working on it while we were visiting at Christmas and told her how beautiful it was and she said I could have it. Sweet!) It's made of these beautiful, warm, autumnal colors and is done with an entrelac technique and it's absolutely gorgeous. I received more than one compliment on the scarf today and was grateful for the warmth (both literal and figurative) it provided.

Amazing People

Rough week, as you can probably tell. Good things have been happening, I just haven't taken the time to sit and reflect on them. Maybe if I had the week wouldn't have seemed so difficult. Hmm.....

I know I've written previously about how much I love my job, but let me just say again: it is such a privilege and honor to observe different teachers every day. Teachers are truly amazing people.

Case in point: I observed a second year teacher early this week. The lesson was good but I had some concerns about equity of consequences (behavior management). I met with her the next day and we talked about it - and BOY, am I glad we had that conversation. Turns out she is very much aware of each of her students' needs and situations, and the different reactions and consequences were based on that knowledge. That conversation reminded me of Rita Pierson's TED talk. I hope that during my time in the classroom I had that sort of positive impact on my students.

Robb and Ren and Really Yummy Popcorn

Today was crazy. I'm behind at work and, in an effort to dig myself out of the pit, told Robb I wouldn't come home until I was caught up. Well, 11 hours later I gave up and went home. (I did get really close to being totally caught up. Maybe it will happen tomorrow. Ha!) So today I am grateful for

1. Robb, for holding down the fort at home and letting me focus on my catching up,
2. Ren, for giving me good hugs and making me laugh, especially when we made
3. Really Yummy Popcorn. Making popcorn (in a glass-topped pot on the stove, with a two year old) is awesome. Particularly when you get hugs while you wait for the oil to get hot enough.

So grateful for my guys today. They make life wonderful.

Food

Today my standout moments and realizations all centered around dinner. I love to cook and bake (which is a good thing, since I have to do it often), and tonight I got to be a little creative. I'm grateful for delicious produce from our CSA, I'm grateful for the things I've learned about flavor combinations and cooking since I met Robb (he eats a much broader variety of foods than I used to), and I'm grateful for our little herb garden. Oh - and lest I forget - I'm grateful dinner turned out to be delicious!

(And in case anyone wonders, it wasn't too off the wall, just butternut squash stuffed with white and wild rice, onion, garlic, parsnips, broccoli, celery, crimini mushrooms, slivered almonds, parsley, sage, and rosemary. No thyme.) :-)

The Sound of Silence

Today I am grateful for the sound of silence.  More specifically, I am grateful for the sound of the power drill turning off and not turning on again!  Robb has been sanding his giant steelcase flat file for three days (!!!) and we are all VERY grateful the job is finally finished.

Silence is definitely golden.

Laughter

Today was the first day of my week-long winter vacation, and it was rough, emotionally. I just finished putting Ren to bed and was feeling very negative, when Robb told me he'd sent me a link to a funny video. It was a clip of "Whose Line Is It Anyway?", featuring Richard Simmons, and it made me laugh so hard I cried. I definitely feel better, so today I'm grateful for laughter-inducing videos and also for Robb, for sharing this one with me.

Triggers

My work sent me to a conference on New Teacher Induction this past week, and while most of the sessions I attended were based on quality mentoring, I did go to one about social and emotional wellness. (And I was happy to note a multitude of sessions addressing this topic. Teaching can be incredibly draining, so it was good to see the shift in awareness.) During my session the presenters mentioned emotional triggers, and how we typically think only of triggers for negative emotions (i.e. things that make you feel depressed, angry, etc.) It is incredibly important, not to mention helpful, to know what triggers negative thoughts and emotions, but what I appreciated was the presenter's mention of triggers for positive emotions.

I hadn't really thought about it, but I realized I definitely should. Here are my triggers for joy:

• riding my bike (something about the exercise plus being outside really makes me feel GREAT.)
• creating music (singing or playing, either way it lifts me up.)
• cooking/baking for people
• quality time with Ren (reading to him, playing with him, even watching YouTube videos of whatever currently grabs his attention, but most especially doing whatever makes him laugh!)
• hugs from Robb
• spending time with friends

As I said before, in an effort to be mindful I've given thought to what triggers me to start the downward mental/emotional spiral, but I hadn't really thought about what triggers me to feel joy. It's an exercise I recommend for everyone, so here's my question for you: what causes you to feel joy and how can you make it happen more often in your life?

EDIT: I was reminded that the following should be on my list.

• Ryan
• :-)

Gonna be a Repeat

This little man is often the most extraordinary part of my day.  Today I just happened to get a good picture of him, so I'm making the most of it!

I've heard the cliched phrase along the lines of "For you, I'll get the sun, the moon, and the stars." Well, today he was playing with Daddy's vintage spaceships and said "Mommy, can you get me the moon?" I was humbled to think he would view that as within my power. Even though he was happy with an imaginary moon (which the yellow spaceship then ate), I get it. Yes, sweetheart, I will get you the moon - or at least give it my best effort.

Work

Having a job (that I love), being able to work, being able to help other people...all these things create a sense of purpose and a sense of accomplishment, and that is extraordinary!

Friends

Today I had the chance to visit with a friend whom I haven't seen for at least three months. She's the kind of person with whom I can be completely comfortable, and that is such a huge blessing! She's a great listener, is continually supportive, and gave me several amazing compliments over the course of our visit. I am so grateful to have her for my friend!

Music (I think this will be a recurring theme...)

Today (Sunday) it was music again. The choir I conduct is rehearsing "My Shepherd Will Supply My Need". The song has been close to my heart since I first heard it on a Mormon Tabernacle Choir album about five years ago. I love choir rehearsal anyway, but lately they've been even more uplifting.

I also sang a solo in church today ("Consider the Lilies"). As is typically the case, I was almost completely unemotional as I sang, focusing on a technical analysis of my performance rather than the feeling. Don't get me wrong, it's always my prayer that whatever musical offerings I share add to the spirit of the meeting, but I rarely (if ever) feel it myself. So I was grateful when a few people thanked me afterwards and told me the song really helped them feel closer to the Lord. As the topic of the meeting was "Increasing Faith", I'm glad to have added to their experience!

Music to my Ears

I sang at a funeral today. I sang "The Lord is My Shepherd" with two other women. I didn't know the woman who had passed away, but I'm grateful to have been asked to add to her service. I'm also grateful for the incredible power of music - to uplift, inspire, soothe, heal, and give hope. I know I felt some of those things as we sang, and I hope the family did, as well.

Sigh...

I'm grateful for all the times I've dyed my hair and had it turn out right.

Needlecrafting

A few months ago a district-wide e-mail went out that one of the middle schools was doing a scarf drive for a local charity. I decided a scarf was a good first crochet or knit project, sent out an e-mail to all the ladies at my church, and had at least nine people respond. A needlecraft group was born!

There are two things I love about this group. First, I love the chance to get to know other people. Every two weeks when we meet at least one person is someone I don't know very well. I'm not super social, so I enjoy the opportunity to sit, relax, and just chat with other women. It's also wonderful to just be myself. I don't have to be mom-me or wife-me or teacher-me, I just get to be me!

The second thing I love about this group is the opportunity to learn and create something. (And maybe even teach someone else.) Since October I have:
- learned to crochet (single, double, half double, extended single, foundation double, front post and back post stitches)
- made 3/4 of a scarf (I got bored!)
- made a toddler sweater (my attempt to not be bored)
- started a beanie
- started some toddler leg warmers

Creating something always brings a feeling of accomplishment. In fact, it reminds me of a talk given by President Dieter F. Uchtdorf in 2008. The talk is called "Happiness, Your Heritage" and is specifically addressed to women and how we can increase our happiness. One of the things President Uchtdorf talks about is the act of creation. He said:

Creation brings deep satisfaction and fulfillment. We develop ourselves and others when we take unorganized matter into our hands and mold it into something of beauty—and I am not talking about the process of cleaning the rooms of your teenage children. 

You might say, “I’m not the creative type. When I sing, I’m always half a tone above or below the note. I cannot draw a line without a ruler. And the only practical use for my homemade bread is as a paperweight or as a doorstop.” 

If that is how you feel, think again, and remember that you are spirit daughters of the most creative Being in the universe. Isn’t it remarkable to think that your very spirits are fashioned by an endlessly creative and eternally compassionate God? Think about it—your spirit body is a masterpiece, created with a beauty, function, and capacity beyond imagination. 

But to what end were we created? We were created with the express purpose and potential of experiencing a fulness of joy. ⁴ Our birthright—and the purpose of our great voyage on this earth—is to seek and experience eternal happiness. One of the ways we find this is by creating things....
You may think you don’t have talents, but that is a false assumption, for we all have talents and gifts, every one of us. ⁵ The bounds of creativity extend far beyond the limits of a canvas or a sheet of paper and do not require a brush, a pen, or the keys of a piano. Creation means bringing into existence something that did not exist before—colorful gardens, harmonious homes, family memories, flowing laughter. 

What you create doesn’t have to be perfect. So what if the eggs are greasy or the toast is burned? Don’t let fear of failure discourage you. Don’t let the voice of critics paralyze you—whether that voice comes from the outside or the inside. 

If you still feel incapable of creating, start small. Try to see how many smiles you can create, write a letter of appreciation, learn a new skill, identify a space and beautify it. 

^... 

The more you trust and rely upon the Spirit, the greater your capacity to create. That is your opportunity in this life and your destiny in the life to come. Sisters, trust and rely on the Spirit. As you take the normal opportunities of your daily life and create something of beauty and helpfulness, you improve not only the world around you but also the world within you.

Today I'm grateful for our little group, for the opportunity to create something, and for the reminder of this awesome message from Pres. Uchtdorf. I'm going to try to remember to exercise my creative capacity each day, and I hope you will, too.

The Doldrums

From Google:

dol·drums

ˈdōldrəmz,ˈdäl-,ˈdôl-/

noun

1. 1.

   a state or period of inactivity, stagnation, or depression

What a rough couple of days! I'm hoping it was hormonal, because I don't want to experience the doldrums again any time soon. (Super insecure, super depressed, super negative, at least one crying breakdown, etc.)

<Shaking it off.>

So. Today was better. Could be because I started off the day biking to an appointment at a nearby school and it was a beautiful, clear, cool, winter day. Could be because I love my job. Could be because I found a fun recipe and made a delicious dinner. Or maybe it was (finally) being quick enough to grab Ren and save him from a tumble off the dinner table bench. (The bench people, not the floor. We're talking maybe 18 inches?) Yup, Super Mom right here. (For the catching part.) :-)

I don't care about the reason, I'm just SUPER grateful for a better day.  Hooray!!!

I hope your weekend was better than mine, and that your week started off well, too.